On Tuesday Channel 4 had a Bodyshock special called The Girl With Eight Limbs. The very next evening, on Five, there was Extraordinary People: The Boys Joined At The Head. I make that 16 limbs, three heads (little Lakshmi's parasitic twin didn't have one) on two channels over two nights. Four and Five are like two angry octopuses, locked in battle, each trying to out-freak the other. And freak us out.

At least Four, in calling its strand Bodyshock, is pretty much admitting it's a freak show. Weirdly, I find it hard to get that tune out of my head - "Wooooaaaaah Bodyshock, Bodyshock for meeee" (as an eight-limbed girl skates past, wearing lycra and however many pairs of roller skates it takes).

In this one, Mohammed and Ahmed Ibrahim aren't skating anywhere, or even walking. They're joined top-of-the-head-to-top-of-the-head, so they can't even see each other.

A surgeon in Texas is prepared to give separation a go, even though the chances of both surviving are tiny. So the boys, who are from Egypt, fly out on one passport, hoping to come home on two. And the long division begins